Romantic relationships can be complicated for anyone, but when you have a disability, there are extra layers that not everyone talks about. I want to change that.

One of the hardest things is not knowing if someone will see you for who you truly are. You wonder if they will look past the differences, or whether the disability is all they see. Some people with disabilities are also still learning about boundaries and what they mean. That can make things even more confusing to navigate.

There are also moments where you question whether someone is genuinely interested in you, or whether they see you as an easy person to take advantage of. All you want is to be in a normal relationship, to be loved and respected like anyone else.

Dating Apps

I have used Bumble and Hinge, and they can be good, but they can also feel strange, because you haven’t met the person before and you don’t really know who they are. That said, some of my friends have had wonderful experiences through dating apps and are now married, so it absolutely can work. I think what would make a real difference is more awareness and better support within these platforms for people with disabilities, because we deserve to feel safe and included in those spaces too.

Disclosing Your Disability

I believe earlier is better. Yes, it can feel nerve wracking, but there are so many good things about you to share too. Some people will surprise you with how sweet and genuinely interested they are. When the timing feels right and you tell someone, it can feel good like a weight off your shoulders. And when it goes well, it can bring you closer together.

If speaking up feels too hard, don’t be afraid to ask someone you trust to help you tell them. You don’t have to do it alone. And if someone can’t accept you for who you are that tells you everything you need to know.

Red Flags

Red flags can be hard to see, especially when you really like someone. But deep down, if something feels off, trust that feeling. The more you know yourself, the easier it becomes to recognise when something isn’t right and when you’re more worried than you are happy, that’s worth paying attention to.

Dating in Public and Accessibility

Dating in public comes with its own challenges when you have a disability. Venues and experiences need to be more accessible, and I think there is still so much room for change there. If a place can’t accommodate you, that’s on them, not you. The world needs to do better so that everyone can enjoy a date without barriers getting in the way.

Self-Love

Loving yourself means knowing yourself, knowing what you want, what you deserve, and what you won’t settle for. Everyone is different, and that’s a beautiful thing. Learn from others, share your own experiences, and don’t be afraid to give advice to a friend going through something similar. We grow together.

The Role of Family and Friends

Telling someone you trust about your relationship is so important. A good friend will tell you if something doesn’t seem right and sometimes that honesty can save you. Family can also be a wonderful source of support if you feel comfortable opening to them. You don’t have to navigate relationships alone. And leaning on your group of friends can make the whole journey so much easier.

What Past Experiences Have Taught Me

My past experiences have taught me to keep moving forward. Feel good about yourself first before anything else. Don’t change who you are for someone. You are enough exactly as you are. Keep trying, keep believing, and hold onto your friendships along the way because they will carry you through.

My Dream

My dream is to have a relationship that feels healthy and safe one that starts from a place of friendship, where we genuinely know and care for each other. Someone who helps me and who I can help in return. Beyond my own relationship, I hope to help others navigating this too to break down the barriers and show that people with disabilities deserve love, connection, and happiness just like everyone else.

A Message to People Without Disabilities

If you are dating or thinking about dating someone with a disability, please see them for who they are not their diagnosis. We have so much to offer. We are funny, caring, loyal, and full of life. We just want what everyone wants to be loved for exactly who we are. Open your heart, be patient, and you might just find something special.

To Anyone Who Feels Like They’ll Never Find Someone

I’m still in the same boat as you and that’s okay. Take it slow. Trust yourself. If something doesn’t feel right, talk to someone close to you. Don’t change anything about yourself for anyone. Feel good about who you are first, keep trying, and keep believing because you will find your person in time.

Amy